February 10, 2016
Hi all! So after a great weekend with my sister in law in town for a visit, I went back to see my RE doctor today because I started my period so I needed to find out if that cyst on my ovary went away so we can be in the clear for a medicated IUI this month. I honestly was not as disappointed this time around of not being pregnant and I am not sure exactly what it is that the reason for that, but maybe I am just tired of getting upset every single month. I was disappointed, don’t get me wrong, but I wasn’t devastated like I usually am for at least a day. Maybe it’s because I am exercising daily, praying daily and focusing on my business and finishing my certification….maybe I am just tired of feeling sorry for myself…lol!
So, back to the doctor appointment…NO CYST!!!! So, we get to try again this month with a medicated IUI cycle and I am relieved. Also, to boot, I had 14 follicles this month which is more than I have had before!!! I have usually had 11 at the most which is less than what is ideal, but enough to work with before. The ideal amount (per my doctor) is 12-20, so I am really excited about having 14!
On a more somber note, Jon is still having some anxiety around our future, being 40, wanting to spend more time with our family and feeling like we are not where we should be in life. I can honestly say this is one of the hardest things I have experienced with him because he is so unhappy and it is really hard for me to understand some of why he feels the way he does (some things I do because we don’t have any children of our own and we are struggling with that) and I can’t fix it for him or snap him out of it to see all the things we have to be grateful for. That is the hardest part for me….I hate seeing the most important person in my life struggling so much….pray, pray and pray some more, is all I can do.
Peace and love to all of you…
Sarah